kickin' and screamin'

Gees. I've always had this problem of a little thing I like to call.....tah-dah, Self-discipline. Thus, I had hoped to write something I was thankful for daily, but I have not. This does not conclude that I am not overwhelmingly thankful, but simply that the Father lavishes his blessing on me that I become gorged with them and am so exhausted that I forget that I must take the time to remember and rejoice in them.
Well that being said. I am thankful for friendships. Okay now before you stop reading listen for a minute. Real friendships. The ones who sit across from you in Mexican restaurants and tell you that they know you aren't perfect and never thought you were and are gonna still love you. The ones who push you just a little outside your comfort zone because they really like you and don't care who knows about it. The ones who ask you the hard questions because they care more about the Father's glory than about my own comfort. Cause a little secret? They know I will only truly be in His comfort if I delight myself in Him and His desires. The human spirit amazes me. And the Lord oh so gently reminds me how quickly I can slip back into thinking that I have the position to judge. I know, I know this might sound ridiculous but sometimes I get overwhelmed by the hurt I see. (Now don't get me wrong, my flesh gets the best of me a lot of the time and I get really impatient with people.)
For example, I work with this girl....at some place...in some town. And well, she's hurting. She shovels herself out to any and all men that might give her some attention. She's angry I can tell. She lies. She doesn't like me for one reason or the other. And frankly that really gets under my skin. But my brother asked me the other day if I was reaching out to her. Loving her. And I had to say I wasn't. I was letting that creepy little beast of pride crawl back in. The Lord used that one question to remind my spirit that I am that girl I work with, or at least I used to be. All alone. Searching. Reaching for anything that might make that deep nagging go away. I am so thankful to be reminded that the more someone screams, the more they are hurting. No matter how bothersome I might in my selfish world think those screams are...they are cries of someone. A sinner. Just like me. Wanting a savior and perhaps not know Him.

Please read...

So things aren't always easy. However, I will say this, the Lord is so extremely faithful and I love him so much for that. Love doesn't even seem like the right word for it simply because I use it so often. I am in love with him and I know that I have never been in love before. I think it would be harder to distinguish if I had felt that earthly love, but right now I am just thankful that I have not. I am overjoyed that my Lord is the ultimate Healer. If I'm to be honest, there is simply no reason that I should be this at peace right now in my life. My story is a that of a wretch and a wretch I am for sure, but He sought me with a determined love.
I look back on the past year, and pretty much a lot of my life, and my heart breaks for who I was. I am not sure I know her all that well anymore, and for that I am overjoyed. It is sad though, the lost girl I used to be. Sad in a way that truly deep down breaks my heart and brings tears to my eyes. Trying so hard to be something I never was intended to be. Becoming exhausted for all the wrong reasons. I was stressed beyond reason to try and find love and it landed me in the most horrible and miserable of places. My heart is still healing and as some might say, still bleeding a bit, but He is healing my wounds. (Self-inflicted or not) I want to tell her she is loved. That she has been set apart as Holy, but she wouldn't listen I know.
My soul truly does well up with praise. Why me? I'm not really sure, but I am blessed beyond measure, beyond reason, beyond qualification. We serve a mighty Holy and simply put amazing God. I wish my soul was at liberty to share with all of you the miracles He has performed in my life. I don't think I have even been able to process them all.
The road is long before me in this process of striving to become more like my Father, but with the strength I desperately beg from Him, He will make my life fruitful. For His glory. He is faithful. My God is faithful to save.

Trinkles of delight...

Wow- its been a long long time. Well not really just like a week or so, therefore not totally clear as to where to start....
Went to the beach. I love the beach love love love it. I know this may be hard to believe, but this is the first time my friends have ever invited me to the beach. It was stinkin' amazing. I usually go with the family and that's fun, but well you know fun of a different sort. Neways...we just relaxed. I didn't get as tan as I normally do, but that seems to be less and less important as I get older. I need to add here that I was graciously asked to go because Brandi's husband Shane decided to go to Cleveland (lame), but fantastic for me. We walked around Rosemary beach, which is a delightful little beach town. Kinda like some part of Italy dropped down into the good portion of Flordia. Here's a little info on it if you'd like to take a gander. Honestly, I think it might be one of the greatest places I've ever tromped around. It tops my list on places I really want to stay. We ate at a really good restaurant called Paradis. It was pretty close to the definition of its name. Brandi and I shared this amazing chocolate cheesecake for desert with french press coffee. Now that's something to be thankful for. It was just great food, fantastic conversation and godly fellowship. Couldn't have ever deserved such a blessing.

I stole some pics from everybody so I'm gonna put some on here, well just so you can get the general awesomeness idea.
The beach...you know, crystal clear waters, slight breeze. Amazing.

The History Channel and the Mayans- I mean seriously what get's better? Clearly Brandi and I think little does.


Okay so I had to put this on here. Our last day we stopped at Amavida coffee. Fantatic coffee and lattes by the way and these two kids had these matching hats on. Had to take a picture of that. No explanation needed.Reid Chapman- and yes he kept the sunglasses on of his own free stylin.

For now, that's it. My soul wells up with thanksgiving.